I'm back and all caught up on the posts. January is a super busy month for me because in addition to my full time job I take on 3 extra sets of accounting books and Jan 31 is the filing deadline for GST (Canadian sales tax) and Jan 15 is the deadline for filing any last payroll taxes for the year. In addition to that I volunteered to host the January activity thread on here which was a bad idea because every time I came on the boards I would update everyone's totals and then wouldn't have time to post anything else. I had hosted it in December too and it wasn't so bad but I wasn't as busy and after awhile you kind of get tired of it. I know better now - never do two months in a row!
I wasn't very active in January which was bugging me but this morning I walked 5K and tonight I did a super killer aquafit class and my legs are sooooo sore right now. I will be at another one tomorrow morning so I finally feel like I've got my mojo back.
I will be back more regularly now
I am glad you are back. Spring is just around the corner. Let us all recommit and get ourselves consistently moving in the right direction.
I don't think your request is odd. And I understand your feelings. I would rather that you focus on a positive instead of a negative for motivation. You will not always feel this way about your wife and I kind of feel like using her as your "mantra" so to speak, just keeps all that to the front of your mind. All the feelings you post about your home situation definitely strike a chord with me and makes me remember a low point in MY life. I guess I am responding to you the way I wish someone had responded to me. Someone to tell me that everything will be ok and only time is going to heal it. Ok, off my soap box.
Glad that you spoke with your boss and he is going to work with you. That will help you refocus now that you know you will be able to do the races.
I know that maintenance is not what you were hoping for, but you have made PERMANENT changes. They have stuck. That is awesome! I do not think you are failing. Remember, you were on the couch for years and one year is not going to undo all that. And you have lasted 1 full year at this and did not give up. That shows determination and focus. Adjust your goals and keep moving! You've got this.
I hear you loud and clear. And I see your point. I appreciate what you are trying to say. I recognize that I have made positive changes. I know I am now healthy. I am sticking to my healthy eating, for the most part. A couple chips here and there but I am really sticking to it.
I have not told you 1/2 of the stuff about my life so it would be hard for you to understand. But, here is a quick snapshot. My mother once told me I would never graduate from college so I shouldn't even bother applying. I wanted more from my life so I applied on my own. When I got accepted to a school I remember being so excited I went to my aunt and uncle's (they were there for a cookout) and told them. She told me I was crazy for even trying.
Fast forward a few years. I graduated from college, with virtually no support from my parents. I made honor roll one semester and when I showed my mother my grades she said, "That's nice but what about that C?" Anyway, after graduation I got married (May of 1998) and just 5 months later my parents sued me for roughly $30K. This was the amount of money they had agreed to pay for my college. Obviously there is a lot more to the story but that could take days to write. Needless to say, they aren't nice people. I haven't talked to them in over 16 years. My whole point was, it was because of my mother telling me I couldn't do it that kept me going. Hearing my wife say I was a fat lazy slob and I would never amount of anything helped keep me going during my marathon. Back when I was a couch potatoe I always said, "I will run the Boston Marathon one day." She laughed at me. Of course I didn't know you needed to qualify. And I am proud I ran any marathon. But, I will run Boston one day. And I am no longer a fat, lazy, slob.
The irony is, I am seeing now that my wife is JUST LIKE MY MOTHER. So, I have spent my whole life, in one form or another, with a woman who was very controlling and negative. I can NEVER let either of them be right. I am way better than what I have shown to them over all of these years.
At this point next year I want to be able to say that I passed my first CFA test and I qualified for Boston (although that may be the harder of the two). I want to look at my stomach and see muscle, not fat, for the first time in 20 years. Not because other people will think I look better (although that can't hurt either) but because I know I deserve it finally. And I know I am capable of it too. This is why I put so much pressure on myself.
Ok, today is weigh in day. Down 1.4 lbs for a total of 19 lbs. In 2 more weeks it will be a year that I have actively trying to be fit and lose weight. 20 lbs in 1 year is definitely not where I thought I would be. However, I did not give up and have stuck with it so I will just have to be ok with that. I need to take some of my own advice and be happy that I stuck with it and didn't give up like I have too many times in the past.
I did get out and shovel for an hour last night. We have a snowblower and my husband was out there with that while I did pathways, the back deck and freed up the garbage cans. My arms are definitely feeling it. I am really glad I did because they did end up cancelling Zumba due to temperatures. Blah. My husband could not understand why I would shovel when he could snowblow the whole thing except the deck. Smh.
StayCool- you are 100% correct in the advice you gave me. We should both be proud that we have stuck with it for this long. Does it stink we aren't where we wanted to be by now, sure. But, does it feel good knowing we made a goal for ourselves at this time last year (ToT) and that we went and both finished. I know it does for me. Sometimes I realize what I accomplished last year. I mean last February I was scared to death to sign up for ToT. But, I did and with no running knowledge whatsoever I did a marathon too, in just 7 months of running. Now it's time to kick it up a notch and see what I am actually capable of doing.
I know for a fact this weather is killing me. If it's not 2' of snow it's 3' outside. I mean it is dragging me down. So I don't blame you for skipping Zumba. But we need to fight through it.
Okay, I'm trying to get used to the new format but it's weird. I'll get used to it, I guess.
I assume you enjoyed the last quarter in particular. I wasn't invested in the outcome but had plenty of friends who are rabid fans on both sides. I was just glad we got a good game.
As far as motivating you, if you're really stuck in a negative spiral I might remind you that there's a reason you started making changes in your life and that the one person who should have been most supportive wasn't - but I agree with Stay Cool that you need to find a positive motivator. You've come a long way in a year and when you back slide, you recognize it and fight - that's more than a lot of other people do out there. All those people who said you couldn't - you've already proved them wrong. Now you just have to keep sticking your finger in their eyes. I like the idea of a mantra. I use one when I'm running and I hurt and want to give up - Pain is inevitible, suffering is optional. Reminds me that I'm the one responsible for my feelings and decisions.
I'm glad you worked things out with your boss and that he seems to be supportive of your running. Which marathon did you register for? I'm trying to decide if I'm going to do Marine Corps again and/or go for the NYC or Chicago lotteries. Or if I just want to focus on speed and the half since I've run a marathon already this year.
How is the CFA studying going? When will you take your first test? One of the young men who used to work for me is on his way out of the Navy and is talking about that program as well.
Dizzy - you got all the New Years Resolution people - eeek. No wonder you were so busy!
Sounds like you're all starting to track in the right direction again - and snow shoveling/blowing is totally a full body workout. I wish we had some of your snow. It stinks that we're below freezing so often and only one real day of snow to show for it. Last year the biggest snow storm we had was the 3rd week of Feb, so I'm holding out hope. Didn't manage a run yesterday, so got in 3 miles this afternoon and a core workout. I did three 30 second planks and am sort of regretting it. Looks like I'll have to back down on the time...but the PT did say I should do some plank in addition to my regular PT, so I wasn't going against orders (not that that would stop me if I were determined.)
I am not loving this new format either. I am not getting emails when you guys respond like I had set up before. I need to figure that out.
You know what my positive motivator was last year? Tower of Terror. I wish I could sign up for another Disney race. But, I will be doing the Baystate Marathon again. Haven't officially registered yet, it doesn't open until 3/1. But, I ran it last year to gain the experience of running that course, knowing this would be the year I go all out to qualify. I know what to expect this year. I am hoping my new book 80/20 Running will be the key to success. It says running slower during training helps you run the races faster. It has science to back it up.
I would love to run the Marine Corp Marathon. That's in October too, isn't it?
Yeah, the last quarter of the game was exciting for sure. I am glad it was a good game. Blowouts are boring.
I have many mantras. One of them is , "Successful people do the things unsuccessful people don't want to do." Or, "If you continue to do the same things you have always done you will get the same results you have always gotten."
CFA studying is HARD. I am behind schedule because there was one week there that I was so bummed I didn't exercise or study. But, I am back at it and making progress. The test is in December so I have time.
I know this may sound weird coming from the crazy guy on the internet but one day I hope to get to meet all of you, at a Disney race perhaps, and give you all a hug and thank you for all the support.