So I know this has been discussed and posted in the past but here is the actual information about this "DVC perk" right from the member website.
Top of the World Lounge Access
Top of the World Lounge is located at Bay Lake Tower at Disney's Contemporary Resort.
Disney Vacation Club Members staying at any Disney-owned-and-operated hotel at Walt Disney World Resort (whether they booked with vacation points or cash) may enjoy access to one of the vacation kingdom's most exclusive spaces: Top of the World Lounge atop Bay Lake Tower at Disney's Contemporary Resort through December 29, 2016 (blockout dates apply, including but not limited to December 30, 2015, December 31, 2015, July 3, 2016, July 4, 2016, December 30, 2016, December 31, 2016). Current operating hours are 6 p.m. to midnight.
This perk is available exclusively to Members and those in their traveling party who are staying on that Member's reservation. At least one Member in the traveling party must accompany the group and present his or her current MagicBand or Key to the World card with a Disney Vacation Club Membership notation in order to gain admission to the lounge and observation deck. If the Member's MagicBand or Key to the World card doesn't display a Membership notation, a Disney Vacation Club Member ID is also required to verify Membership.
It clearly says a member must be present to utilize this perk so it clearly is not intended to be avail to members friends or family that might be using the points instead of the member. As we all know sometimes they make exceptions to the rules and I would think the OP might not have a problem going up because she is both the spouse of the member in this case and listed as an associate member (as opposed to simply being a joint member/owner on the account) but I wouldn't want the many others who will ultimately read this thread to count on definitely being admitted. The website clearly says non members aren't eligible to access TOWL without the member present.